MCDXCVII

Prod the Protestant o Preen the Prelate o Drain the Druid o Dip the Deity o Choke the Cherub o Hump the Hindu o Finesse the Philistine o Fiddle the Pharisee o Wrestle the Reverent o Molest the Muslim o Oralize the Organ o Bang the Buddha o Smack the Semite o Beat the Bishop o Fondle the Friar o Yank the Yak o Knock the Nun o Grease the Grouse o Grip the Grail o Jerk the Jesuit o Stroke Saint Steven's Slick Slender Salami o Ream the Rabbi o Peel the Patriarch o Poke the Parish o Pet the Priest o Pop the Pope o Pump the Pope o Punch the Pope o Pull the Pope o Pork the Pontiff o Paddle Pontius Pilate's Party Pepperoni o Whack the Witness o Lubricate the Lutheran o Undulate the Eucharist o Masticate the Missionary o Castigate the Catholic o Baste the Baptist o Butter the Benedictine o Violate the Vishnu o Milk the Monk o Chafe the Church o Agitate the Acolyte o Caress the Choir Boy o Trample the Trinity o Ramrod the Resurrectionist o Adorn Adonai o Eviscerate the Evangelist o Shake the Shinto o Dress the Davidian o Unzip the Zionist o Cork the Cardinal o Christen the Kosher Kielbasa o Boink the Baptist o Handle the Host o Vent the Adventist o Break Brother Barry's Butt by Bat-Bashing o Dork the Deacon o Mate the Mormon o Hump the Hebrew o Shake the Sheik o Shake the Sheik o Pull the Pulpit o Will God get Glory from this? o Probe the Priest o Manhandle the Monsignor o Pound the Preacher o Drive the Deacon o Whip the Flagellent o (For the REALLY Limber) Blowing the Baptist o Baste the Bishop o Elevate the Apostle o Hail the Risen Lord o Enter the Evangelical o Lick the Lutheran o Loose the Lutheran o Molest the Methodist o Pound the Pagan o Spanking in Tongues o Alter the Altar Boy o Empty the Evangelist o Heimlich the Hutterite o Milk the Muslim o Slap the Savior o Massage the Minister o Pump the Purple Pontiff o Slap the Sukwoo o Drink from the Chalice o Rub the Rosary o Rub the Good Reverend o Bang "Bob" o Uke-A-Wrist o Stimulate the Scientologist o Fondle the Fundamentalist o Jerk the Jehovah o Shake the Quaker o Abraid the Agnostic o Unhinge the Humanist o Jebi Kucku Katolicku o Flog the Bishop o Arise the Ayatollah o Cuff the Catholic o Polish Your Purple Pentecostal Pal o Manipulate the Mormon o Manhandle the Muslim o Handle the Hare Krishna o Whip the Wiccan o The Ten-Inch Commandments o Agitate the Atheist o Rub the Rabbi o Genuflect to the Liquid Pearly Gates o We Plough the Field and Scatter/The Good Seed on the Land (English Hymn) o Jerking for Jesus o Whack Uncle Walt Til He Rises from the Dead o Yank the Yogi o Climb the Crucifix o Purge the Pentagram o Fondle the Fundamentalist o Help Holofernes Get His Head Off o Pound Paul's Peter o Warm Up Dinner for the Altar Boys o Bop the Bald Bishop Until He Barfs o Stroke the Steeple o Spunk the Monk o Slack the Subgenius o Touch the Torah o Mess with the Menorah o Slip the Shinto o Bang the Bishop o Jam with Jah o Diddle the Diocese o Hump the Halo o Pounding St. Peter o Monsignor Gaillot o Zap the Zoroastrian o Exorcise "It" o Pulpit the Penis! o PUMP THE POST o Grope the Gregorian o Whack the Witness o Pound the Proverb o Chafe the Chapel o Float Potential Down the Nile o Fondle a Pharisee o Fondle the Pharaoh o Prime the Pagan o Seize Caesar o Grease the Grail o Diddle the Discordian o Blow the Buddhist Like the Pulsating Flutist o Mount the Mormon o Succumb to the Sadist o Pound the Pugilist o Love the Lingum o Pummel the Pontiff o Polish the Pope o Prepare the Holy Water o Paint the Pews o Transubstantiate my Tube-Steak o Blessed Relief o Strangle the Sacred Staff o Justice By Own Hand o Stroke Saint Stevens Slick Slender Salami o Poke the Pudenda in the Primate o Juice the Judas o Jolting Jesus o Juggling Jesus' Jawbreakers o Throttle the Theologian o o o Knock the Nun o Bop the Bishop o Hanging Judas til he Pukes Pennies o **EXCORIATE EXODUS**LUBRICATE LEVITICUS**OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD**gee it's smaller than i re-member** o *& sung tunefully) "Who's that singing the Psalms?/Is that hair on my palms?* o i can't believe that somebody's censored my entry ... but it's two ... this page is deteriorating from the sublimely tasteless to the conservatively illiterate mumblings of the masturbatory masses ... I said (he repeated) PHUCK THE PHARAOH. Now do it! Religiously! o Beat Baal o Sending the Devil His Due o Froth the Creator o Pop the Pope o Prepare a Bit of Penitence o Jab the Jedi o Smite the Phallus Teens! o o the Second Summing o the Second Summing o Ramrod the Righteous Right Rand o Inseminate the Ether o (more music) Oh -- cum cum cum cum cum to the church in the wild-wood kindly leave your contribution in the Kleenex o o Lathering the Limbaugh o Boys Boys: it's all about finally figuring out that you cannot make a mountain out of something that small! o Bonk the Bishop o Knock the Kun o Phlog the Philistine o Dick the Deity o Dish up the Bishop o Suck the Sadducee o Puck the Pharisee o Phuck the Pharisee o Catholicize the Catamite o o Shag the Sherpa o Stroke the Scientologist o Caress the Cardinal o Caress Koresh o Necro the Hare-Krishna o Shake Limbaugh o Limbaugh the Limbaugh o Heave the Heathen o Shake the Shamen o Gloss the Cross o Throw a Noah o Throw Water on the Burning Bush o Milk the Sacred Cow o Visit the Seminary o Palm the Psalm o Make Some Manna o Make Some Manna o Molest the Minister;