DXXVIII

Leeke-a zee sooddee deep clereety ooff un LSD treep ell zee thuooghts und feeleengs I'fe-a elveys hed ebuoot my budy ere-a noo shuooteeng tu me-a et fooll blest. Zee fueeces hefe-a ixeested furefer boot I used tu toorn doon zee fuloomne-a su zeeur cuntrulleeng iffffect ves soobleeminel. (Zee keeller pert ooff zee stury cumes vhee I seemply reeleeze-a zee fueeces ere-a in fect my oovn und I cuntrul zeem. Ha! I gooess I'll hefe-a tu vreete-a unuzeer chepter vhee I reech thet pert in zee plut. It'd be-a iesy tu vreete-a zeen effter zee fect.) I seelenced my inner reeleety fur must ooff my leeffe-a. Nut thet I deedn't hefe-a ooppurtooneetes tu leestee. Zeere-a ves zee teeme-a I sterted seeeeng a zeerepeest (veellingly fur zee furst teeme-a) becoose-a I vunted tu stup feeleeng sooeecidel und needed help deeleeng veet zee memureees und zee iffffects ooff my pest sexooel eboose-a. Dooreeng zee inteke-a interfeeoo zee zeerepeest esked me-a hoo I felt ebuoot my budy seeze-a. I seeed "Ooh I'fe-a vurked fery herd tu eccept myselff. Yeeh I'fe-a deelt veet thet. I sev her fur a yeer. Boot zee troot ves I cuooldn't hundle-a gueeng thet deep. Noo it mekes sense-a becoose-a zee dept ooff zee feer und selff-hetred thet I em uncufereeng seems inffeenite-a. I gooess I hefe-a inuoogh muments ooff beeeng ook et thees stege-a in my leeffe-a thet I cun hundle-a it. My intellect und psyche-a hefe-a beee et ver furefer oofer zee fet troot. Zee furst teeme-a I gut ungry ebuoot my cheeldhuud leeffetime-a ooff furced deeets I ves 199. It ves zee dey beffure-a I mufed es fer evey frum my femeely es I cuoold get. My ded esked me-a -- fur zee lest teeme-a -- vhee I ves gueeng tu luse-a veeeght. I hed spent my leeffe-a in terrur ooff thees mun fur zee feeulence-a he'd cummeetted boot zee qooesshun fooeled ell zee feer I ifer felt intu oone-a unstuppeble-a prujected fleme-a. i screemed neerly oooot ooff cuntrul thet I deedin't ifer vunt tu heer unuzeer vurd effeeen ebuoot my veeeght frum heem ifer egeeen thet he-a hed foocked up my vhule-a leeffe-a by mekeeng me-a hete-a myselff. I remeended heem hoo he-a behefed veet me-a vhee I ves 4 gueeng evey oon a treep und hefeeng me-a prumeese-a thet I'd be-a skeenny fur;