XXXVII

A charming old custom in which the victim is sliced open and a live Gila monster placed into the body cavity then sewn tight together, another day at the office. How can people spend so many hours each day being so miserable and angry at the world and at each other?, as one called upon to give an idea of the ocean to a person who has never seen it can only say "It is a vast sheet of water", at length he said respectfully "Sir -- just now I can't accept anything more. Please let us not speak of this for the present." "Very well. Then we'll stop here", at the rate of 10000 burgers per cow McDonalds' annual sales of 3 billion burgers require the deaths of 300000 cows a year, conceives an aversion for the ear sounds: the nose odors: the tongue tastes: conceives an aversion for the body things touchable: for the brain ideas, der meisters of trudge-spew have spewed forth these slabs at some point previous to now (whether these are dated or not I have literally no idea, "Do you ever feel guilty having all of this?" I asked him. "Your family? Your career? Your looks? Your wealth? Your stardom? All this stuff here in the hangar?", Does it matter which of us on a sucky planet imaginatively named Earth in some sick joke of a solar system personally sucks more?, Don't worry about such things. Sooner or later all such talk will die down." And it did. In less than a month there was no more talk about such trifling fears, earlier that day I had chugged warm beers sampled some mushroom caps and smoked buds of homegrown courtesy of these '70s-rocker types from Tom's River, first thing out of bed your mind accustomed to thinking the same thoughts for so many years will think those same thoughts yet again. But now you will have an answer, full danish hardcore kiddy porn shots of children being made to lick each other's genitals in such a manner as to cause you to shoot vinegar, he criticized her way of writing: he said that instead of smoothly blending together the parts remained separate like jellybeans lay in a jar, he kept repeating in a series of weak moments "It'll fatten up the resume a bit more. It'll fatten up the resume a bit more", he phoned me out of the blue yesterday. "Hi is Kenny Goldsmith there?" "This is he." "I can't believe you are not on our mailing list! After all these years!", he said that while he admired the radical gesture of the writers he couldn't see how any of them would ever pull the heart string of a reader, I can't stand it when people talk about some store and they add an S on the end like "Let's go down to Burger Kings" or "Did you get that at Hechingers?", I couldn't believe that he turned to the group gathered and said "He's Kenny's favorite poet. He likes the way he keeps meaning intact and together", I for one am just glad I passed on the triple bean burrito bran muffin and Metamucil this morning. Now that would have been a real disaster, I put my more noble priorities on the back burner and began to think of myself as a superior back-in-the-race-power-broker, if you go past the library the librarian might recognize you and inquire about the thirteen overdue books that were destroyed in the fire, in prose there's the example of Poe who said that everything should be figured out to the least little detail before ever setting pen to paper, in the whole history of thought no one has painted the misery of human existence in blacker colors and with more feeling than the Buddha, instead of waiting to get married our parents got divorced. Instead of becoming feminists our mothers were left to become displaced homemakers, man why do these people actually go on these talk shows and talk about their affairs with the same sex and animals with siblings etc.?, Meeting the brilliant poet turned out to be a real disappointment. Not only was he patronizing but also pedantic -- strangely insecure, my father who I've always hated for having been responsible for my birth was doing vodka slammers with Yuri Andropov's haberdasher, oh coming up and diarrhea on the tile floor a gum of pizza stain the Vaseline t'aint the burger, people living on the other side of the world really DO care about what kind of drugs you use frequently and how sexually active you are, so many buy into Freud and not into Jung even a little fascist connections don't make the rest of Pound unreadable and not Jung either, the blasting television displays babies giggling as $50.00 disposable Nike baby shoes are superimposed on the retina, the litany is growing tedious and seems better suited to a data base or an appendix rather than to a work of literature, the majority of Asian females I have met have had really nasty and bitchy personalities underneath the charming exterior, the Wagner family -- a clan which Karl Marx found as bizarre as the Nibelungs and equally deserving of an epochal four-part opera, this year we've had an opportunity to see the greatest liars since Richard Nixon Tonya Harding Michael Jackson and the Menendez brothers, we allow for the segments of the world containing bland prose and stilted metaphors. (In fact we're so bored we actually put this schtuff together), we sat on the beach late into the night and I carried on to the two 22-year-old girls about my previous life as a cocaine dealer, we talked on a beautiful mid-September day. She said she was tired of having to think in the narrow way which she had learned over the past ten years, "We're all brought up and taught to be realistic about life" said one "and we don't look at things the way you want them to be you look at them the way they are", What about those painting shows? How many people do you know that paint? I don't know anyone. Replace it with a show on how to use your camcorder, What makes this the end of a century? A convention. What makes this Late Capitalism? A convention. What makes this the dead end of a culture?, Why do stupid people breathe? And why do ugly people breed? Why is it that my girlfriend won't go down on me unless I just got out of the shower?, You will limit your relationships. You will see very few people and the only ones you will see will be those who themselves have questioned who they are;